Emily Hornung: Always Fighting On

My name is Emily, born in Anaheim California, but I was raised in the Coeur d’ Alene area. I work as close to full time as I can get being a server, at Seasons of Coeur d Alene. I completed a certification program and it’s entails almost 2 years ago now, but work in the field is still shy to come by, there are just too many people out of work with more experience. I want to go back to school to be a counselor. I want to work with mentally and physically abused women and children, especially single moms, like me.

What’s something, good or bad, that’s changed your life dramatically? How has this made you the person you are today? When I was a baby, my birth mother had a drug problem; my aunt and uncle adopted me and raised me as their own. I love my parent dearly, and wouldn’t trade them. Growing up I always felt like I didn’t fit, it wasn’t because I wasn’t loved enough or neglected, I just felt different, knowing I was adopted only confirmed that I was. I guess I never felt good enough, my senior year in high school I got mixed up with a boy who made me feel good about myself. Unfortunately that led to a three year relationship that striped me of everything that made me me. I let someone tell me how everything I did was wrong, I was worthless, pushed around, abused, hollow. The silver lining however, I have a beautiful son, a new dream to pursue.

I took my time getting back into the dating realm, when I did finally get into a relationship it was as a new person. I met a man, fell in love, we were engaged. I spent the happiest year of my life with him. Alas, it ended, you can imagine my devastation. I’ve been broken, had my heart beat up, but I can honestly say I’ve never known that kind of desolation. He was my best friend, I honestly didn’t see it coming. Everyone in my life was pretty blindsided. It wasn’t just my own heart that broke though, it was my son. He still asks about my ex fiancé sometime, not very often anymore, and he isn’t so sad, but he remembers. I have learned things about myself though, I can be in a relationship and not forsake myself, I can hold my own, which is how it’s meant to be.

When you were little, what did you want to be ‘when you grow up’? Is this something you are still working toward or have your goals changed? When I was little, there were a number of things I wanted to be, rockstar, adventurer, astronaut, detective, the list goes on. Some of those still sounds pretty appealing, my math skills are too appalling for NASA though, and my dislike of bugs kinda puts a dampen on my Indiana Jones dreams as well. Now I think about counseling, and writing. I have some story poems that someday I would like to have illustrated as children’s books.

What’s one thing you’ve done to Pay-It-Forward? I really cant call claim to much in the pay it forward department, I try to help when I can, and offer up a smile or encouragement. I like to donate to Convoy of Hope when I’m able, they have a “one day of pay” program, when one day of the year you work and put those earnings toward the organization. They work their tails off to feed hungry people, but they do so much more. I’d love to volunteer with them someday, but I just have too much going on right now at home.

You’re a local singer. Have you ever considered starting a band or possibly recording an album? I have definitely considered both a band and an album, solo or otherwise, the opportunity just hasn’t presented itself. I mostly play and write music for fun, it’s also a great outlet for my emotions. I haven’t performed in a long time, besides one open mike around Christmas, and I really miss the thrill of the stage and the spotlight. I’m hoping to find a couple people to get together with and jam and do some opens mic night and gigs every now and then.

You recently had your first audition with the producers of the X Factor. Tell us about it. What’s something that you learned from this experience? The x factor audition I went to apparently was just a northwest local competition for a plane ticket and hotel stay in north Caroline for the real x factor. But I still had fun, even though it was a reeeaaally long day. Not that I wouldn’t do it again, but I probably wouldn’t do one of those particular competition s again, I’d go for the real one, not the home grown. Practice practice practice, and just have fun, it’s hard not to get nervous to be in front of 200ish people and sing, but your doing something you love, so show you love it, and just have fun.

Tell us about your son. How have you remained so strong as a single mom?
My son is my life, my world. I love being a mom, it’s the most exciting and extraordinary thing to ever happen to me. I feel so blessed that i get to call Dominic mine,and hang out with my boy. I can’t imagine my life without him. My parent friends call me a hoverer, I just can’t help it. It’s not for my lack of heart aches and breaks and rough patches, because I definately have run into my share. I think part of it is that i am really stubborn, the rest is god, well the stubborn is From god too since he made me that way, haha. Sometimes people tell me how strong they think I am, for handling my life as I do, but what was I supposed to do? When I left Dom’s dad or my fiancé left, I couldn’t quit, Dom needed a mother, we had bills to pay, and I am not one to take something sitting down anymore. I don’t like being thought of to lose, or fail, the cards are already stacked up against me, but we do the best we can with the hand of cards we are dealt. I would never for a second consider folding, of giving up. I would do anything, be anything, for my son, he is my life my soul. I listen to him breathing at night, and it’s then sweetest sound I’ve ever heard. His smile is the sunshine to me. There aren’t words to describe how I feel about my baby, the words don’t reach deep enough. I have more than myself to worry about and take care of, its not just me anymore. I have to remain strong, because no one is going to be strong for me. I have an awesome family and friends behind me cheering me on, but at the end of the day, it’s still up to me to deliver.

What’s your greatest goal in life? Well, to see Dom succeed, to be the provider he deserves. Under that goal, I’d say helping people, in whatever way I can, be it music, counsel, or however else.

Where do you see yourself in 10 years? In ten years, well, Dom will be about 13. (!!!!!!!!!) hmm, hopefully I’ll have completed school, I’ll own my own home, be involved in some kind of volunteer program, and fingers crossed, be married, (knock on wood!) I would like one more baby, but if I only have Dom, well, he’s pretty Spectacular anyway. I do want to travel and see the world, but it can wait, I’d like to take Dom with me too, so when he is old enough we will do something. I’m determined to take him to Hawaii one day, my family went without me because Dom was too little, don’t worry I told them to go. But I made a goal that when Dom was old enough to go and enjoy it, I would take him there.

Tell us about one person who inspires you. Why?  I’ve spent a lot of time thinking this one over. There are so many people in my life who inspire me, way too many to go over.

What else would you like to say to the readers of 2147miles.com? The spirit to fight on burns in my heart, to never give up, to keep fighting. To let life throw everything it has at me, to knock me down, make me cry, make me angry, to feel helpless. My son inspires me. He trusts me to be there for him, so I fight on. For my boy, I will always fight on.

Leave a Comment